Reblogged from mooseinajar
WHAT YOU SHOULD DO:
- Stay with us and keep calm.
The last thing we need when we’re panicking, is to have someone else panicking with us.
- Offer medicine if we usually take it during an attack.
You might have to ask whether or not we take medicine- heck, some might not; but please, ask. It really helps.
- Move us to a quiet place.
We need time to think, to breathe. Being surrounded by people isn’t going to help.
- Don’t make assumptions about what we need. Ask.
We’ll tell you what we need. Sometimes; you may have to ask- but never assume.
- Speak to us in short, simple sentences.
- Be predictable. Avoid surprises.
- Help slow our breathing by breathing us or by counting slowly to 10.
As odd as it sounds, it works.WHAT YOU SHOULDN’T DO:
1. Say, “You have nothing to be panicked about.”
We know. We know. We know. And because we know we have nothing to be panicked about, we panic even more. When I realize that my anxiety is unfounded, I panic even more because then I feel like I’m not in touch with reality. It’s unsettling. Scary.
Most of the time, a panic attack is irrational. Sometimes they stem from circumstances — a certain couch triggers a bad memory or being on an airplane makes you claustrophobic or a break up causes you to flip your lid — but mostly, the reasons I’m panicking are complex, hard to articulate or simply, unknown. I could tell myself all day that I have no reason to be having a panic attack and I would still be panicking. Sometimes, because I’m a perfectionist, I become even more overwhelmed when I think my behaviour is “unacceptable” (as I often believe it is when I’m panicking). I know it’s all in my mind, but my mind can be a pretty dark and scary place when it gets going.
Alternate suggestion: Say, “I understand you’re upset. It is okay. You have a right to be upset and I am here to help.”
2. Say, “Calm down.”
This reminds me of a MadTV sketch where Bob Newhart plays a therapist who tells his patients to simply “Stop it!” whenever they express anxiety or fear. As a sketch, it’s funny. In real life, it’s one of the worst things you can do to someone having a panic attack. When someone tells me to “stop panicking” or to “calm down,” I just think, “Oh, okay. I haven’t tried that one. Hold on, let me get out a pen and paper and jot that down, you jerk.”
Instead of taking action so that they do relax, simply telling a panicking person to “calm down” or “stop it” does nothing. No-thing.
Alternate suggestion: The best thing to do is to listen and support. In order to calm them down without the generalities, counting helps.
3. Say, “I’m just going to leave you alone for a minute.”
Being left alone while panicking makes my heart race even harder. The last thing I want is to be left by myself with my troubled brain. Many of my panic attacks spark from over-thinking and it’s helpful to have another person with me, not only for medical reasons (in case I pass out or need water) but also it’s helpful to have another person around to force me to think about something other than the noise in my head.
Alternate suggestion: It sometimes helps me if the person I’m with distracts me by telling me a story or sings to me. I need to get out of my own head and think about something other than my own panic.
4. Say, “You’re overreacting.”
Here’s the thing: I’m not. Panic attacks might be in my head, but I’m in actual physical pain. If you’d cut open your leg, no one would be telling you you’re overreacting. It’s a common trope in mental health to diminish the feelings or experience of someone suffering from anxiety or panic because there’s no visible physical ailment and because there’s no discernible reason for the person to be having such a strong fear reaction.
The worst thing you can tell someone who is panicking is that they are overreacting.
Alternate suggestion: Treat a panic attack like any other medical emergency. Listen to what the person is telling you. Get them water if they need it. It helps me if someone rubs my back a little. If you’re in over your head, don’t hesitate to call 911 (or whatever the emergency services number is where you are). But please, take the person seriously. Mental health deserves the same respect as physical health.also: DO NOT YELL AT US OR TELL US WE AREN’T GOING TO DIE. We know we aren’t going to die, but here’s this: panic attacks can mimic heart attacks which is scary as fuck. We feel like it may be the end even though we know it will pass like every other time. Yelling at us and saying “calm down, drink water, you won’t die” doesn’t help. In fact, it stressed us out and makes our anxiety levels spike. Panic attacks are frightening and awful. Please be sympathetic and do what you can do help anyone who has them
Reblogged from mooseinajar
This is one of the most adorable comics I’ve ever read
I’ve been waiting for this to pop back up on my dashboard.. we are way too hard on ourselves.
YES, EVERYONE!! Read this! You’re wonderful!
This is exactly what I needed today
WHOEVER MADE THIS I LOVE YOU
Reblogged from intumezzo
You cannot say that you like Pocahontas. The genocide of my people is turned into a cartoon musical with a singing raccoon? I mean, think about it, dawg, the real story of Pocahontas is about a bunch of white boys who come to my land, bribe the corrupt indian chief, kill off all the warriors and fuck the indian princess silly.
as much as I loved Pocahontas as a kid when I grew up and realized it was literally a genocide story I can’t watch it the same.
How to build a journeyman’s piece
Reblogged from goatsarecrazy
It needed to be said, since I’m tired of every conversation about our comic (on other sites) devolving into discussion of my crotch giblets.
Of course, that comes with the huge caveat that I am personally an open book, but that’s only when asked directly and within context (i.e., the subject of my crotch has been brought up, by us). Otherwise, it’s needlessly invasive, objectifying, and rarely comes from a place of genuine understanding. And that’s my liberal take on the subject. Imagine a trans* person who is as private as any other person or isn’t “out” or experiences dysphoria with their bodies.
This is a lesson lots of people need to learn: don’t be a Katie Couric.